What’s so hard about loving people?
Send a check, some food, vaccine.
But what’s the point of loving people?
You may as well eat Soylent Green.

Even Ivan in his ivory tower
Still loved the human race;
It’s effortless to love a stranger,
Especially one you’ll never face.
Mankind is perfect–a perfect stranger.
And causes, unlike lepers,
Are easily embraced.

So give your heart–to Africa.
Show charity–from the drivethru lane.
(Your dollar helped cure cancer.)
Yes, climb your onion up toward Heaven
–While kicking off those hopeless souls
Still clinging to your callous soles:
Ah, to Hell with all of them!